Admit it, gals; your bestie’s guy is hot. His presence makes you tense and you’re laughing with his not-so-funny jokes so he would recognize your witty personality. You talk a lot almost about everything and it seems incomparable; compatible for each other even. But then, reality is just few miles with your best friend telling, “He’s mine. All mine”.
Until one day, they broke up; leaving you torn between two emotions: half-heartedly sad for your friend while wholly jumping with bliss for his taken “guy” now turned “ex”. When encountering such scenario, should you be the good sympathetic best friend? Or seize it as a go signal to finally reveal the admiration you once hid from within?
Here are the lists why dating “him” can mark you as rebound on the love game and worst, ruin your friendship with your best pal.
1. Not a happy ever after always. Just because he looks appealing outside and gentleman on the inside doesn’t mean you can work your relationship the fairy tale way without forging to any love mishaps.
2. Many fishes in the sea. Opt for better ones aside from him. Though men vary in terms of characters, we can’t deny the fact that there are still tons of boys who can win your heart without any records of marring any of your closest friends’ feelings. Try to distinguish him when it comes to talents, physical capabilities, inner qualities and interpersonal skills and you’ll find out; maybe, he wasn’t exactly the one you’re dreaming to be with.
3. Talk of the town. To add beef on the break-up issue, you’ll be the center of naysayers’ comments and backstabbing. You realize you’ve become liable and now contemplated as the third party for the relationship failure. You actually wanna fight back and cover your ass, but the evidences were so strong of you dating him that none of those whom you have explained believes on what you say.
4. Immeasurable Comparison. I mean it girls: guys have tendencies to adopt “differential equation” thing. So, it’s either you prove your worth to not be easily compared to your best friend or you flow with the current. When dating him starts, he will spot your favorite pop songs, your hateful algebra, your hobbies and many more. If he’s into sports and you’re not; and your best friend spends the whole day with him playing hopscotch and Wimbledon, you’re dead. You’ll get disappointed for not liking what he enjoys and vice versa. There’s a possibility he’ll end up searching what’s missing to you that he expects to see. Sooner or later, you’ll be stuck performing what you usually don’t and you’re chasing to become identical with your best friend.
I do believe everyone has their own differences and it’s up to us on how we will express our peculiarities. If he can’t accept for what you are and don’t; and pressure begins to reach your nerves, it’s best to reconsider things before it’s too late.
5. Best friend or Boyfriend?Remember, friendship can never be replaced but boyfriend can. Having to open a relationship with a guy your friend has past memories with will create potential avoidance instead of building rapport in the future. Awkward moments will likely occur between the two whenever you invite them for occasional gatherings.Don’t sacrifice your friendship over him no matter how deep you have fallen into.
If you can’t control the situation, have an intimate talk to your best friend and explain stuff in details but courteous way. Make sure she’s currently moving on with the stiffness of the break-up and ready to recap things to refrain from any misunderstandings later on.
Before you accept his proposal…..
Ask for the reason of break-up. Is it the guy’s or girl’s fault? If he does, was he able to save their relationship or make up for the fault he committed? If she’s to blame, what steps have she completed to resolve the concerns? Delve deeper if everything was a fanciful show to impress you for falling on his trap and leave you unexpectedly broken-hearted.