I Could Have Had It All

I Could Have Had It All

I write this blog entry soonest after I read a message on my e-mail:

When I saw how failure am the day I opened my e-mail, I don’t know what I should do. Cry? Or laugh and go with the flow? My hands were shaking and I can’t feel my thumbs typing on my computer. Soon, the screen became blurred. There was an inaudible sound. Everything went blank. I reached my phone to inform my group mates, spreading the bad news”: Hey, we didn’t make it to the finals”. No one replied. It was a relief neither anyone criticized the efforts we exerted. Unfortunately, I missed the best part-winning.

I appreciate the fact that I am no good at all. I am born to be unlucky. I have doubts of leading a group and possessing ground-breaker characteristics for the fear of losing…for the fear of becoming a major punches line on joke time. The agony remains unbearable in the past few days. I am afraid I might be scolded and sentenced on my flaws.

The greatest failure I committed. I always been pressuring myself to be the best I can that’s why here’s what I got.

Sometimes, success is not enough. It will only lift your spirit.

Sometimes, success is not enough. It will only lift your spirit.

When you fail, the first thing that registers to your mind is not coping. You will consider what could have been to avoid such misfortune. Eventually, I recovered. I used to stick to my mind that that day could have been one of the greatest frustrations I’ve had. Basically, it was. Soon, I meditate using the bible and communicate with my folks. I actually had a favorite inspirational quote from that experience:

“Work as if everything depended on you. Trust as if everything depended on God.”

Should I worry again when I stumble down instead of standing, dusting the dirt upon my dress? Maybe next time, prayer will do. Needless is it to sing, “I Could Have Had it All”. Right?


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